Wednesday, April 29, 2015


My Ralph.

He is 8 today. I cannot believe it.

He was born on a beautiful Sunday. I remember so many little details about this blessed day. It was a true gift from God.

Our family enjoyed a meaningful worship service that morning. Pretty sure we sang Everlasting God, which would become very meaningful for me a few days later. After church I was feeling like maybe I was going into labor, so my sweet husband fed the children while I rested in my room. It was a golden day, the sun was shining and my bedroom windows were open to the breeze.

As I labored gently, there is no other way to describe this labor, I could hear the children playing outside our home. Our home. Life was perfect in the new home we had built and moved into only a few months earlier. I couldn't have been happier or more content at any other moment in my life. The sunset made our bedroom glow.

My darling husband called the midwife. We had everything ready to go for another home birth...but I requested that she not come too soon this time. I labor more comfortably and confidently when I am unobserved and quite secluded. I sang worship songs along with my favorite radio station and wandered from the bed to a warm bath and back again. It seems like a dream now.

I can't say enough about my brave and wonderful husband, who was able to track my progress with coaching from the midwife over the phone. (I mean, really? The things that man has done for me...) Anyway, she arrived to the house about dark and things got serious very quickly. She found old meconium in the amniotic fluid upon breaking my water and I powered that little baby out in no time...this was an emergency.

I remember quite clearly how darling my little Ralph was, from the very first moment I saw him. So cute. It just struck me. And I remember the midwife saying, "I think your baby may have Down Syndrome." But I didn't just didn't matter. His lungs were full of gunk and he couldn't breathe. I just wanted him to be OK...DS or not.

We called 911. Firefighters, policemen, and paramedics showed up. So many people. The ambulance driver missed a turn to get on the highway. The doctor at the hospital was so rude. I refused to be admitted so they made me walk all the way to the NICU to see Ralph. Our lives fell apart that wonderful night that turned into a nightmare.

I am so truly thankful for the peaceful labor and the wonderful memories of the day Ralph was born. God must have know that I would need to hang on to this wonderful memory to face the hard days ahead...days when I was sure he would not make it through.

Now Ralph is healthy, and strong and so very big! The peaceful, beautiful memories and the dark, difficult ones remind me that God is always in control, and I have SO very much to be thankful for, even in seasons of difficulty and sorrow.

Thank you, Ralph! You have taught me so much in the past eight years. Happy birthday, you handsome boy!!