PSA - What to say.

I guess I should balance my "What not to say" post with one about what TO say, particularly to a new parent of a child with Down Syndrome. This can be a minefield! It may or may not be a frightening time for the new parents. They may or may not have had a prenatal diagnosis. There may or may not be additional health issues.

They may not be answering the phone! Seriously folks. I was so traumatized after Ralph was born that I would not talk to anyone for weeks. (It was mostly because he was so sick. Down Syndrome was the last of our worries at the time.) I can laugh about it now. No one had the opportunity to say the wrong thing to me because I wasn't talking to anyone.

This minefield is really easier to navigate than you might think. Isn't he cute?

Here is what you could say:

Congratulations! Appropriate for any new parent. Often accompanied by a gift!

Wow! He is really beautiful! You can substitute pretty, handsome, cute, or groovy.

Can I hold him? You won't regret this. Babies with DS are so soft! (Please always ask before you grab or touch a baby or child with DS. Germ-o-phobes like me will appreciate you.)

What could you say to a parent of an older child with Down Syndrome? What would you say to any other parent of a typical child? It's usually safe to ask questions. Ask about their interests. Ask about school. Invite them over. Set up a play date with your children and theirs. Offer to babysit.

Parents of a child with Down Syndrome often find themselves becoming socially isolated. Your invitation or offer will reassure them that their child is accepted and respected. That's a treasured gift.